February 12, 2004

As I walked back from the Amazing Salad Bar of Saint Phat with 1.88 pounds of various carefully-selected foodstuffs in a handy plastic box with a plastic tube of aspartame-laden carbonated brown water on the side, I was thinking about how much I loathe American politics. The pettiness on all sides, the stupidity of the media, the desperate scrabbling in the dirt to prove how the Other Guy's integrity is suspect, blitheringly oblivious to the fact that such scrabbling only demonstrates the weakness of the scrabbler's character.

I was thinking about the whole pile of "Look! Bush was AWOL! Deserter!" nonsense in particular, but now I come back to an equally pungent mountain of steaming bovine effluvia:

CAMPAIGN DRAMA ROCKS DEMOCRATS: KERRY FIGHTS OFF MEDIA PROBE OF RECENT ALLEGED INFIDELITY, RIVALS PREDICT RUIN

Great. Just great. Once again, the usual crowd of idiots is seeking to change the politcal landscape based not upon an examination of the poor quality of a man's thinking or the cynical absurdity of his actions, but upon the disposition of his penis.

Somebody shoot me.

Better yet, somebody shoot them.