After having worked over twelve hours straight for free to fix a fuck - up that was almost entirely my fault, and after having had three Grolshes, here is a list of 20 things that I am sick of:
1. This laptop.2. Assholes who pretend to talk about hurricanes when they're really talking about politics.
3. The Supreme Court (all of them).
4. Burger King.
5. The disposition of Andrew Sullivan's penis.
6. My cocoon.
7. Anyone with the historical sensibilities of a greasy piece of Saran wrap that's been half - heartedly draped over an old turkey leg that nobody really wanted; this, it seems, is damn near everyone.
8. The entire opinion writing staff of the New York Times. You all suck. Always. Shut up.
9. Newscasters of all networks who can't even ad - lib about an airliner's emergency landing in a way that doesn't make me mourn the death of Jack Paar, hate Jay Leno anew, and want to beat them with a copy of... no, screw the literary pose, just make that "a 2x4 with nails in it."
10. The small child that I carry around in the form of subcutaneous fat.
11. People who refuse to proofread.
12. Celebrities.
13. The entire Arabian Peninsula and any country remotely related to Persia.
14. Ill - informed "educated" people who would've been better off in trade school but now have blogs and won't stop writing.
15. The Pope.
16. New York.
17. Strongly expressed opinions formed in the vacuum of ignorance, inexperience, and self - importance.
18. The word "peace."
19. Criticism of US emergency preparedness from Europe, land of the Heat Wave Massacre (or, to be more specific, le massacre de vague de chaleur).
20. This list.
That is all. Now go about your damn business.
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UPDATE:
I'm not really sick of my laptop. It rocks.
But yours sucks.
